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Airships, Crypts & Chocolate Chips




  Airships, Crypts & Chocolate Chips

  A Cozy Witch Mystery

  Erin Johnson

  For my readers

  Thank you for being here and for helping me live my dream—I am so grateful.

  I hope you enjoy this one!

  Contents

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  1. Tea Time

  2. A Light in the Attic

  3. The Black Box

  4. Memories

  5. Kitchen Nightmare

  6. A Mission Impossible

  7. Having a Ball

  8. Blueprints

  9. The Salon

  10. Postcards

  11. Working the Party

  12. Rap Sheet

  13. Horace’s Kitchen

  14. Sleight of Hand

  15. The Lab

  16. The Run Through

  17. Bon Voyage

  18. The Countess

  19. Greetings

  20. Security Checks

  21. The Hoard

  22. The Mirror

  23. The Great Escape

  24. An Audience

  25. A Tale

  26. Cut Off

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  1

  Tea Time

  I edged closer to the door. My feet padded on the thick carpet—quiet. I hardly dared to breathe. I wrapped one hand around the gold knob shaped like a sea shell, my stained linen apron clutched in the other. So close—almost out.

  “Imogen? You’re leaving us?” Queen Edith, Hank’s mother, looked up from the tiny dog in her lap. She’d been so occupied stuffing the pup’s round little body into a skintight miniature mermaid’s costume that I’d hoped to sneak out unnoticed. No such luck.

  “Uh, yes, your majesty.” I dipped into a quick curtsy. “I’m afraid I’m already late for my shift in the bakery.” Considering we started baking at the crack of dawn, that wasn’t entirely true. I’d already worked for a few hours, then sprinted to the queen’s lounging antechamber, which connected to the reposing room via the door in the back. I couldn’t have told you the difference between them, but when I made a joke about my embarrassment over almost reposing in the lounging room, no one laughed. Well, no one except for Emmaline, who tried her best to hide it.

  I sighed. None of Hank’s sisters-in-law or his mother ever laughed. The most they did was squint and titter behind their hands. Emmaline, married to Hank’s eldest brother, Cas, was the only tolerable one. Her lavender hair contrasted with the blue velvet chaise she sat on. It pained me to watch her futile efforts to make conversation with Hank’s mother. Queen Edith was more interested in the fat dog in her lap.

  I sighed and mentally shook myself. I wasn’t usually so negative, but lately I’d been spending a lot of time with these women at royal teas, luncheons, and gatherings like this one. The men were just as bad—I had no idea how Hank had turned out so wonderful, but I grinned as I thought of him. Even though I’d been seeing a lot more of him in the month or so since we’d been back from the Fire Kingdom, which I loved, it was constantly in the company of his family. Which I did not love.

  CRASH! I jumped as a vase toppled off the side table and shattered. Servants stationed around the room rushed forward. One scooped up the shards, another righted the table, and a couple more soothed the crying children who’d knocked it over in the first place.

  “Brook.” One of the princesses stifled a yawn behind her hand and peered over the back of the sofa she lay splayed out on. “What did I say about breaking vases?”

  The little boy answered with a shriek and sprinted across the room to tackle one of his cousins. His mother rolled her eyes and sank back into the plush cushions. “He has a lot of energy. It’s best to let it run its course.”

  I caught Emmaline’s eye and her lips curled up at the sides. She dipped her head and stared at the teacup in her lap to hide her grin.

  “Right, well, I’ve got to go, so….” I jabbed a thumb behind me and opened the door.

  Another one of the princesses popped a grape into her mouth, bit down, and then scrunched her face. “Eck.” She motioned a servant over and spat the half-chewed grape into his gloved hand. “It was sour.”

  I literally bit my tongue.

  She looked up at me and blew a blonde ringlet out of her face. “Imogen. How do you do it? I daresay I don’t know how you return to those dank, dark servants’ quarters of yours after experiencing the grandeur of all this.” She lifted her gloved arms and gestured about the room. I took it all in. Four princesses, plus the queen, lounged about on sofas and chaises, while over a dozen children screamed, cried with red, swollen faces, or used priceless heirlooms as weapons against each other.

  I shrugged and pressed my lips tight together. “It’s a struggle.”

  Emmaline choked on her tea.

  I stepped out the door and had nearly managed my escape when Hank’s mother lifted a finger. “Oh, Imogen.”

  I bowed my head to hide my grimace. “Yes, your majesty?”

  “When the girl comes up, do have her bring some of those delightful fruit tarts.”

  I nodded and edged out the door. Never mind that the “girl” would probably be me. When the latch clicked closed, I let out the breath I’d been holding. Free at last, free at last. I veered left, my heels clicking along the glittering mosaic tile floors as I speed-walked down the hallway. Chandeliers dangled high overhead and oil paintings and ornate vases decorated alcoves. I headed toward the door at the end of the hall, which was flush to the wall and nearly hidden. It led to the network of servants’ halls and quarters that allowed us to go to and fro without offending royal personages by having to see us.

  I threw my apron over my head and reached behind me to tie the waist straps. I hoped Sam had saved me some coffee. The green tea the queen served was not nearly strong enough to get me through the rest of the day. I sighed. I’d been needing a lot more caffeine these days. I felt like I was living a double life—mild-mannered bakery worker on one hand, and girlfriend to the prince on the other. And with royal dinners and banquets and balls, I’d been consistently up past my baker’s bedtime of 9:00 p.m. I stifled a yawn against the back of my hand as I stopped in front of the camouflaged door.

  As I reached forward the door flew open and a figure burst out and ran right into me.

  “Oof!” I stumbled back.

  Madeline L’Orange, the journalist I’d met in the Fire Kingdom, opened her dark eyes wide. She held a hand out to me, a notepad clutched in it, while her magical quill hovered next to her head. “Imogen? Well if it isn’t Bijou Mer’s Sweetheart’s sweetheart.” She shrugged her large leather bag higher on her shoulder. Countless papers stuck out of it at all angles. “Apologies. I need to watch where I’m going.” She grinned. “Maybe there’s a spell for that.”

  I pressed my lips together and gave her a nod. I liked Madeline, almost against my will. She’d goaded me into spilling a big secret, but I had to admire her drive and determination. Still, I didn’t feel like accidentally letting anything slip that would make it into the gossip co
lumn today.

  I’d been all over the papers lately, since Hank and I went public, and I wasn’t enjoying the newfound fame. I bit my lip. In fact, the last time we’d tried to all go out for happy hour at the Rusted Wreck, we’d been so swarmed by journalists that we’d been forced to leave. Maple and Wiley and all my friends claimed they didn’t mind, but even if that were true, I did.

  And that was the least of my problems. I still hadn’t told anyone about meeting with Horace in the Fire Kingdom and that I’d planned on leaving with him for the Badlands before he set a monster on the city. I swallowed. Iggy was still the only one who knew about it, and the more time that passed, the worse I felt about keeping this from my friends and Hank.

  Madeline turned as I moved past her. She chuckled. “You know, that was clever, back in Calloon. Telling me your own secret about Hank having a girlfriend. You really threw me off track.” She rolled her eyes. “Well, that and the wild goose chase Princess—my bad—Queen Shaday led me on.” She winked. “You’re quite the trickster.”

  “Uh, yeah.” I edged toward the entryway to the servants’ quarters, ready to escape to the bakery, but curiosity got the best of me. I turned back to Madeline, who shifted her enormous bag again. “How is Shaday, by the way? Any news from the Fire Kingdom? I mean, I hear all the official stuff, but, you know—what’s the word on the street?”

  Madeline’s almond-shaped eyes flashed and she tossed her long black hair over her shoulder. “Oh, the people love her. Well…” Madeline tipped her head side to side. “Most of them. She’s having some issues getting some of the tribes on board, and some are not happy with her decision to prosecute Ario Tuk for his part in the whole monster fiasco.” She sneered. “But if you ask me, she’s the best thing that ever happened to that kingdom.” She beamed. “She and Elke.”

  I grinned. “They are cute together.”

  Madeline arched a dark brow and her floating quill zipped to the pad of paper in her hand. “Care to make a statement about that?”

  My face fell. “No.”

  “No juicy gossip or stolen moments you care to share about the royal couple?” Madeline flashed me her most charming smile. “Or maybe you can dish about this rivalry between Princess Emmaline and the social queen bee from the Earth Kingdom, Louella Davenport?”

  I answered with a flat look.

  She shrugged and the quill hovered back beside her head and tucked behind her ear. “You know I have to try. Gossip sells, and I’ve got bills to pay while I work on my big piece.”

  “The uh, Carclaustra Prison piece you mentioned?”

  She scoffed. “Yeah. Not that I have much. Good luck getting access to records. No one’s even allowed in that place unless they work there.” She held up a hand. “And yes, before you even say it, I have tried to get a job undercover but my record precluded me.”

  I grinned. Obviously what I was about to suggest. Then I frowned. “You have a record?”

  “Let’s just say I got a little too wild at a human Mardi Gras party and may have violated some international magic treaties.” She slid closer. “But let me tell you who got the most beads of anyone on Bourbon Street.” She pointed both index fingers at herself. “This woman.”

  I squinted. “Good job?”

  She laughed. “I have hope, though. With Bernhardt finally dead already.” She stopped herself and bowed her head. “Sea rest his blackmailing, lecherous soul.”

  I tilted my head.

  “We might get a new warden who’s willing to provide more transparency.”

  I lifted a brow. “You’re thinking of Urs Volker?” He’d been the previous warden’s tough-as-nails second-in-command. “Isn’t he already warden?”

  She shook her head. “Temporary warden. The prison board’s still got to approve him.” She leaned close and spoke behind her hand, even though we were the only ones in the cavernous hallway. “Word is they may not vote for him.”

  I lifted my brows.

  “He’s the best qualified for the job.” She ticked his qualifications off on her fingers. “He’s a master of hand-to-hand combat, has military experience, knows the prison inside and out, and is one of the grimmest men I’ve ever met.” Her eyes lost focus. “It’s kind of hot actually.”

  I waited for her to say something but she just continued to stare off into space.

  “Madeline?”

  She shook herself. “Sorry.” Her pale cheeks flushed. “Got lost in a little daydream there. Guess I have a type.”

  “Prison wardens?” I frowned.

  “I had a weird childhood. Anyway, as qualified as he is, the board is concerned he’s not got the people skills. As warden he has to schmooze, drum up funding for the prison, rub elbows with the rich and royal.” She shrugged. “From what I can see, he’s much more principled than dirty ol’ Bernhardt, and if by some miracle the board actually approves him, I may finally get a chance to either confirm the rumors or at least influence some positive changes.”

  I gulped. “Rumors?”

  She shook her head. “The conditions are said to be horrendous. No one who goes in there ever gets out, and there’s no oversight. No one really knows what goes on in there, or how the prisoners are treated.”

  I shuddered. “Well, I’m glad you’re looking into it.” I shot her a small smile. “If anyone can dig something up, it’s you.”

  She winked again. “It’s why they call me the shovel.”

  “They do?”

  “No.”

  I lifted a hand. “Well, I’ve got to go. Good to see you.” And I actually meant it.

  She waved back with the notepad still clutched in her palm. “Wish me luck. I’ve got to do a fluff piece on little Timmy, or is Willy? I don’t know, one of those kids’ birthdays.”

  I grimaced. “Good luck. I think it’s Willy, and be careful not to get too close. He’s a biter.”

  She let out a heavy sigh and took off toward the lounging antechamber, while I stepped into the much humbler servants’ hallway. I jogged down the narrow, darkly lit space. Muffled voices sounded through the walls every now and then. A few weeks ago K’ree had tearfully announced that she was leaving us to return to the Fire Kingdom. She’d left in the first place because as a woman, she hadn’t had many opportunities, but with Shaday in charge, she now wanted to be a part of the exciting new changes to her home kingdom. Plus, she missed her family.

  I’d understood, we all had, but I still missed her every day. And it left us short-staffed. And with me running out nearly every day for some royal appointment, it made it even worse. My stomach turned with guilt at my friends having to work extra hard to make up for my slack. I picked up my pace and dodged a couple of maids hurrying past with buckets. After some twists and turns, I left the servants’ hall and stopped before the arched double doors to the bakery.

  One swung open and I gasped in delight as Hank strode out. He turned his head my way and his face lit up with a giant smile when he saw me.

  “I was just looking for you. Maple said you were with my mother.” He grew mock serious. “Are you still in one piece?”

  “Willy didn’t bite any of my fingers off, despite his best efforts, so yes.” I grinned as he wrapped his muscled arms around me and slid his hands around my lower back. I rose on tiptoe and kissed him. Something in the center of my chest tugged me even closer to him and I slid a fingertip over his collarbone. I pulled away, almost groggy. Seriously, how did he still make me feel this way every time we kissed?

  He blinked at me with glazed blue eyes. He shook himself and took my hands. “I’ve got to show you something.” He took a few strides, leading me toward the servants’ hallway I’d just left.

  I dug my heels in and brought us both to a stop. I slid my eyes to the bakery doors. “Hank. I really need to get back to work.” I bit my lip.

  “Maple said they were in a bit of a lull, so I don’t think they need you this moment. Trust me—you’re going to want to see this.” His eyes twinkled and he lifted his thic
k dark brows.

  I sighed and rolled my eyes in mock frustration. “Fine. But if Maple fires me—”

  He let out a deep laugh. “Maple? She’s not going to fire you.”

  I grinned and let him pull me forward. “She might.”

  2

  A Light in the Attic

  Hank pulled me gently behind him by the hand. He glanced over his broad shoulder at me every few steps. “You know how we searched the library for anything on swallows?”

  I nodded and grinned. I hadn’t seen him so animated in a long time. He gestured with his other hand and a pink flush spread up his throat and cheeks.

  “Well, that obviously led to nothing. But after what happened in the Fire Kingdom, I’ve been even more concerned about what Horace might do next. Oh, and I haven’t had a chance to tell you, but I got a message from Chuck, the pirate king. His men got back from their rum run for intel on the Badlands and they spotted quite a few buildings—so many they said it looked like a city. So apparently the Badlands Army is bigger than we thought.”

  My eyes dropped to my feet as my stomach clenched with guilt. I should tell Hank about meeting with my brother—about almost leaving with him. Even now, after he’d set a monster on the city, I still saw him as my brother. And as angry as I was with him, I wasn’t ready to completely write him off as a villain. But I didn’t think Hank would understand that. In fact, I feared Hank would see it as some sort of betrayal. I groaned inwardly. I had betrayed his trust.